What do you mean I can’t wear athleisure everyday?

I’m going rogue this week and dropping some actually helpful tips.

With my “big girl job” quickly approaching, I’m realizing that I soon have to start dressing in work-appropriate attire. This is a hard pill to swallow as someone whose daily outfit generally looks like this:

IMG_2508 2.jpg

Sports, but make it fashion

I like the idea of workwear, but have come to the conclusion that work clothes are generally uncomfortable and prone to sweat stains. More direly, they are EXPENSIVE. As someone who is #ballingonabudget and understands the no-money hustle, here ten tips to keep in mind when collecting your work wardrobe:

1. Be a basic b*tch. Acquire good basic items first, such as a black pencil skirt,  a structured blazer and a good button-up shirt. Honestly, if you don’t know why this is important, I can’t help you.

 

2. Buy clothes according to a colour scheme. By having items that are of similar colours, it’s easy to match most of your pieces to each other, increasing the “wear-ablity” of each item. I tend to stick to neutral tones and variations of my favourite “millennial pink” colour, and generally buy the same patterns. Is it kind of boring? Yeah, but better to be boring than broke 🙂

IMG_3280.jpg

I pretty much only wear these colours

IMG_3281.jpg

This arrangement took TIME so you’re getting it at two angles

 

3. Keep it classic. As tempting as it can be to jump on new trends, more classic pieces have better longevity. Stick to time-honoured prints and fabric cuts that will withstand changes in fashion.

IMG_3272

Looking like the love-child of Sandy and Rizzo from Grease

 

4. Quality is a priority. Get to know a little bit about fabrics and learn which ones are less prone to wear and damage. For example, rayon tends to pill faster than most materials. If you can, check to see if seams and sewing work are well-done. Sometimes it’s better to spend a little more on items knowing that they will be a good long term investment.

img_3291.jpg

Peep my chipped nail polish

 

5. Shop secondhand. Buying items from thrift and consignment stores is not only easier on your wallet, but it’s also better for the environment and, indirectly, increases ethical clothing production. So you’ll be a lil’ richer and, like, a ~good person~.

 

6. Shop like they’re going out of business–literally. Liquidation sales are an amazing way to get good products for dirt cheap prices.

Processed with VSCO with b5 preset

Snagged these bad boys for 50% off at Town Shoes last week.

 

7. Steal Borrow from your friends. Or, if you’re cleaning out your closet, give them items that you don’t want anymore or no longer fit and vice versa.

IMG_3322

I acquired this shirt and sweater while “helping a friend clean her closet”

IMG_3335

Thanks Bria!

 

8. Take care of what you own. Follow washing instructions–for the most part (if I’m being honest, I’ve only dry cleaned like one item in my life). Use appropriate protectant on your shoes/boots so that they last longer.

IMG_3307.jpg

Mink oil, suede spray and silicone spray are my holy trinity of shoe care

 

9. If you are in ~dire need~ of an item in the near future, load up your cart on a site you’re subscribed to (you get promotional emails from them), and then close the tab and wait. A lot of the time the brand will offer you an extra incentive (i.e. a discount or free shipping) to try to entice you to complete the purchase.

 

10. Most importantly, be patient while collecting items. I’ve been buying my “work wardrobe” slowly over the past three years. I still don’t have the full-fledged professional closet of my dreams yet.

And that’s okay.

Comment your best shopping tip! 

Coming up next: Pass off being too poor to own things as “Minimalism”

JWB is the new FWB

C8q1lz2XsAQRYvf.png

One time I tried to draw a happy face on the label of my antibiotics, but I messed up and instead it looked like it was screaming, which is a pretty big mood.

I have come to the horrible realization that I am about four months away from losing access to health and dental benefits.

Growing up, I always idealized workplaces that boasted “fun” perks, such as:

Of course, I still kind of want to have those things–who wouldn’t?–but in the past few years, I’ve started to idealize more practical benefits and perks of workplaces. You know, the ones that actually are necessary for my health and overall well-being.

I’m blessed to live in Canada, which has universal healthcare so broke bois like me can afford to go to the doctor as needed, but dental? Sick days? Prescriptions? That’s another story.

Here’s a list of things I plan to do with these final months that I have access to my mom’s health and dental insurance:

  • any dental work I can get done
  • get new glasses just for fun-sies
  • undergo physiotherapy for the IT band injury I got two years ago and never fully took care of ~oops~
  • get orthotic insoles even though I’m not 100 per cent sure I need them?
  • back massage? I’m not sure what exactly what my insurance covers

I kind of feel pathetic salivating over the idea of having flexible work hours, reasonable vacation time, healthy work-life balance, gym-membership coverage and health and dental benefits; however, I think part of growing up is understanding the value of practical perks over the flashy ones that don’t help you out in the long term. Basically, I’m becoming a boring person.

And that’s okay.

Comment the best workplace perk you can think of! I would sell my soul for a frequently-refreshed edible arrangement to be available at all times in the office.

Coming up next: What do you mean I can’t wear athleisure everyday?

Five Quick Meals for the Grad on the Go

Life is busy, and sometimes maintaining a regular eating schedule can be difficult. Here are some simple meal ideas!

1. The handful of diner mints (one unwrapped) that have been floating in the bottom of your bag for an unidentifiable amount of time make a quick breakfast. If you don’t have time to whip something up in the morning because you snoozed your alarm eight times, these borderline gross mints will have to do!

41090439-6404-41A3-9493-8C5FA6EF29E2.jpg

I pulled this gourmet selection from the bottom of my purse.

 

2. Meal-prep for the first time in five months. Put together a well-portioned, nutrient-dense salad, pack it up, and carry it for lunch. Don’t eat it though: instead, cave in to peer pressure and join your friends/coworkers in heading out for lunch. Scarf down $15 worth of fish tacos and end up having to throw out your now-wilted leafy greens when you get home.

1190449E-2F4A-4998-8B0F-33A5BA0BF7F6.jpg

Mmmmm, tastes like my bank account’s tears.

 

3. For a light snack, try the 2/3 empty bag of abandoned sunflower seeds that you bought on a whim three months ago and has since been sitting in the cup holder of your car. Shove those bad boys into your mouth like a deranged raccoon while parked behind the Chipotle your debit card just got declined at.

F91D08A4-4331-49FF-892C-592C88250542.jpg

These will not satisfy your hunger in the slightest!

 

4. Sleep. The only food items you have in your kitchen are a clove of garlic, stale multigrain Cheerios and seven tomatoes. In terms of quantity of ingredients, you could technically make a meal, but none of these foods go together. Sure, you could walk to the nearby fast food joint, but you can’t afford to drop $10 on chicken nuggets. Go to bed for dinner and hope that your growling stomach doesn’t keep you awake.

 

5. Hungry, but unsure of what you should eat for breakfast? Haven’t gone to the grocery store in three weeks? Unwilling to cook? Desperate times call for desperate measures: do like my friend Taylor and just eat a raw sweet potato.

Screen Shot 2018-11-04 at 1.07.20 AM

Low quality photo for a low quality meal.

 

In all seriousness, life can get busy and it’s okay to admit that you don’t always have the time, funds or energy to eat a healthy balanced diet.

And that’s okay.

 

Comment the most interesting “meal” you have resorted to eating! There was a three day period of my life where all I ate was a Costco-sized bag of oranges.

Coming up next: JWB is the new FWB

Bar life is not the same

Processed with VSCO with f2 preset

Me with PR classmates this summer

I knew that my bar life was destined to go down the drain when I heard the words “Where are my 2000s babies at?!” jokingly yelled by a DJ one night while I was out. I promptly fled the establishment. To be fair, it was 12:05 a.m., which is normally when I leave to go to bed anyway.

I’ve been actively denying the fact that I’m aging since I turned 18; however, now that I feel inclined to ID people before they even try to talk to me at a bar, I’ve been forced to accept that I’m getting older.

My body has forsaken me and now inflicts me with terrible hangovers that last a full day, even though I was able to wake up the morning after a night out at age 19 feeling refreshed. My skin breaks out the moment a vodka soda touches my lips, even though I used to go on week-long benders with ease.

Processed with VSCO with f2 preset

This was during final exam season in third year! I probably should have been studying!

There were times in undergrad where I was in bed, and one text from a friend was all it took for me to throw on an outfit and start doing my hair. Now I need about a week’s notice to mentally prepare myself to go out, and even then I’m sometimes too tired to go to the bar.

I have some important questions about my bar future:

  • Can I only go to “old person” bars now?
  • How much time do I have before bouncers no longer ID me because I actually look of age?
  • Can I keep drinking trashy things like vodka redbulls and jägerbombs, or do I have to develop a taste for scotch?
IMG_3003

Charity bar night the summer after first year. I was not 19 yet 🙂

Even though I physically can’t party the way I did in undergrad–and I don’t really want to anymore–I feel sad about that phase being over. I’m packing away my collection of black bodysuits, mourning the death of the bar life I once had.

And that’s okay.

Comment your best bar experience! One time the bar manager gave me a full plate of fries at 12:30 a.m. and I don’t think I will ever be that happy again in my life.

Coming up next: Five Quick Meals for the Grad on the Go

My friends are getting married and I’m still seeing guys who have Saturdays Are For The Boys flags hanging above their couches 🙃

IMG_5947

I read poems about my (barely existent) love life at an event in undergrad and got a flower for it.

A couple days ago, I was lying in bed, eating pizza and scrolling through Instagram when something terrible occurred: I saw wedding photos of people I knew in undergrad.

There’s a weird sense of pressure. A lot of the people around me will talk about their ten year goals, with things like getting married and having their first kid included. This wouldn’t freak me out as much if I wasn’t still going on first dates with Brad’s and Chad’s who crush cases of PBR and use the term “full send” unironically.

I really messed up by avoiding relationships like they were the plague during my upper years of university. No one told me how hard it is to meet new dating prospects in a post-grad arena.

My friends keep trying to set me up with people using weak common interests that have no correlation to compatibility, i.e.:

  • “You both enjoy independent films!”
  • “He wrote a poem once for class and you write poems so it’s basically a match made in heaven!”
  • “You both can read!”

My friend made me download Hinge, a dating app, but I also struggle to want to meet people after only a text conversation. Although, I am thankful to the one guy whose opening message was “I love you”. Hope all is good, Nick.

I’m not going to end this with a motivational message about being comfortable with being single and recognizing that it’s your time to grow. There’s enough content about that in the world. Wanting to find love and worrying about potentially not finding it is common amongst most people.

And that’s okay.

Comment your worst date ever! Because of who I am as a person, I documented mine with a tweet:Screen Shot 2018-11-03 at 11.36.49 PM

Coming up next: Bar life is not the same

 

Who actually has time to be healthy and hot?

People emphasize the importance of maintaining a balanced lifestyle, but it’s realistically impossible to do everything.

Hi! I’m Stephanie, writer of The Stimac Report, and I’m guest-blogging this week.

As the start of my “big girl job” approaches, I’m wondering how full-time boss ladies have time to exercise.

After Insta-stalking women who seem to have their lives together and dragging my butt to one yoga class, I’ve concluded that it’s scientifically impossible that these women have good jobs, hot bodies, functional families, and time to grab drinks with the girls.

45146890_466598777200158_4135561758062411776_n.jpg

The part blacked out in the middle? Yeah, she doesn’t exist.

It’s all about illusion. These women don’t have to do all these wonderful things–they just have to appear to. I’ve mastered pretending to know about sports and football, but faking #healthyliving is a new arena.

Here are four guises that make it seem like you are a healthy, well-balanced individual:

1.    Wear athletic gear all the time. Lululemon and Gymshark are the brands of athletic posers. Sure, they are great workout clothes, but they’re also cleverly designed  as cute streetwear.

45074597_329950027782387_8859201557963472896_n

It’s me!

 

2.    Do a juice cleanse. Will you lose 10 lbs in a week? Nope. Will you have diarrhea for the next 36 hours? You bet! Will it make people think you’re healthy? There’s a 50/50 chance. If you do try one, make sure to post about it. How else are people to know you are #health?

45079003_260756507964842_6701594530312880128_n

Courtesy of Instagram user @insta.single

 

3.   Own an unnecessary number of running shoes…

…and never be caught–or, at least, photographed–wearing the same pair twice; people will think you go to the gym and run outside daily, if not twice a day!

As a former Nike employee, I have over 100 pairs (oops!).

45142627_568626666906159_5559078636247580672_n.jpg

This is my running shoe collection!

 

4.    Watch sports!

Plant yourself on your couch with a low-cal snack and a glass of water while the game is on. There’s an assumption that people who watch sports also play them or are at least active. Don’t know about football? Check out my blog for all your NFL need-to-knows! 

45163669_1847411998711380_3430597237825077248_n.jpg

Peep that “healthy” Halo Top ice cream

 

Maybe some of the women you see in the Starbucks line actually do have the time (and discipline) to wake up at 4am, workout, get ready for work, make cash money, care for their kids, cook dinner, and spend time with #hubby before bed.

But most of us don’t.

And that’s okay.

Visit The Stimac Report here.

Coming up next: My friends are getting married and I’m still seeing guys who have Saturdays Are For The Boys flags hanging above their couches

DM me on LinkedIn

A66AF7E2-C781-4A30-BCA2-8417D4183CA1.jpg

I don’t even go to this school, but I love this courtyard

A really awful thing happened when I started to think about my career: I actually had to take the LinkedIn profile I haphazardly created in freshman year seriously.

My apprehension about LinkedIn is rooted in my ever-present fear of professional thinking in general. As a life-long self-depreciator, I find it hard to publicize my accomplishments and skills. Growing up, many teachers and peers–directly and indirectly–pressured me to stay quiet about the fact I excelled in academics to keep others comfortable, and that mindset has stuck with me.

Furthermore, university culture practically romanticized struggling in school, with people frequently joking about being close to failing; I always felt like I couldn’t say that I was  doing well around peers who were struggling to understand the course content. The idea that I should be open and proud of my abilities is a very difficult concept for me to grasp.

But that’s enough Emotional Sharing™. Time to get back to the jokes.

I’ve been growing more comfortable with LinkedIn, realizing it’s a lot like Facebook, except people share content I’m often interested in and my mom doesn’t post rude comments on my page. I truly enjoy seeing people in my network share their achievements and cheering them on from behind my screen.

It’s been reassuring for me to learn that LinkedIn isn’t that different from other social platforms. For example, I set up an informational interview with a professional in my field via LinkedIn message, only for him to ask to reschedule. Then, when I did reach out to reschedule, he ghosted me :).

To this date, however, this is still my favourite LinkedIn anecdote:

Screen Shot 2018-10-24 at 12.10.51 PM

Navigating the professional sphere and its nuances is hard, and LinkedIn is definitely a reflection of that. I still don’t really know what I’m doing, but I’m trying my best to get more acquainted with it.

And that’s okay.

Comment your most ~interesting~ LinkedIn experience!

Coming up next: a guest blogger post!